일요일, 1월 23, 2011
empty out and fill it up again
who and what are the priorities in my life. I wonder. when and how am I handling it. I wonder.
my energy, strength, and madness seems to have driven too far away from me to keep me alive with joy and happiness.
reality has come closer to me ever since. I was wrong in everything. how far more can I go. I wonder.
where is the heart of mine which touches the life of others around me. now I no longer feel touched. why? I wonder.
accept who I am or change who I am. i really am not happy. nothing is keeping me there but my faith. I'm hanging onto it really hard and not letting it go because he has never let me go.
in my lowest point in life, in my most sad moments in life, in my most worrying time in life I know he is always there to guide me, help me and shower me with love. I thank him.
it is for who he made me to be. I live.
please keep reminding me that I should love others as much as he loves us.
월요일, 11월 29, 2010
i need
to do the right thing. trust the right thing. belief him.
calm myself down a bit more.
regenerate my energy...for everything. Yes these what i need.
월요일, 11월 15, 2010
for the last 10 & 1/2 months...
Some with many photos, some with little but on a average each month I have at least 2 albums..
this is so much more than the last few years.
all these are memories from bday celebration to outdoor activities, dinning, choir gatherings, museum visiting, holiday trips, IR sight seeing, baby showers,food gatherings, wedding celebrations, Concerts, CNY, charity & volunteer work, Angel's visit, DnD, horse watching, kite flying, Bali trip, Dini's wedding...and etc..
and I'm not ending the year just with 37 albums cos I'm even more packed in Nov till Dec.
So many more things are happening closely together in the next 1 & 1/2 mths. I'll definitely have more to share before I close the Chapter for 2010 !
화요일, 11월 02, 2010
its a whole lot of craps.......
yes definitely a whole lot of craps. why do human like to create so much crap ideas for crap purpose and crap intentions and do crap things with crap discussion for craps issues to gain crap benefits and expect crap results in crap places
to make crap things sound logical and best of all to make SENSE out of crap things!
incredibly, wat a crap!
Equation = life - crap
= meaningful life
수요일, 5월 12, 2010
Now, it's pause for study!!!!
This includes the movie air, shopping air, salon air(think it smells too), eating air (tasty too), cool air, freedom and happy air (definitely a must).
Just ended my last paper at 5.30pm on Tuesday, 11 May 2010.
Funny things happen just before the exam started. Firstly, examination venue is at Sg Expo. I went to check for my seating number outside Hall 7, realising that there was no seats for Bsc Banking & Finance students..(shock ++close to panic) luckily, I overheard that there is another, at Hall 9! I see, my seating no. must be there.
Yes, my name was on the list outside Hall 9. Phew.. cold sweat'''
Check, noted that its Row 29, Seat 1149. Verified with the seating map too.
15 mins before paper starts.. a guy walk towards me and say "excuse me, think this is my seat." (??) I replied confidently, " No, my seat no is 1149." He walk off to double check.
5-7 mins later he return and say. "Yes. This is my seat." (erm, this time, I better go check again since he's so sure) Arg.. pack my stationary and stuff with me and went to check with the helpdesk.
Correct, it is Row 29. 1149 is correct, but it is the index no of the listing...=.= not my seat number...
It should be 1154. The most ironical thing to happen is that the index no. exists in the same row. Thus, resulted in such a silly act of me and mistake.
Just in time to seat down at the right place, settle down 2 mins before paper start.. (worse, am having headache). Realised later that I'm not the only 1 with such silly act. Another guy's was worse, paper has already started. (-.-) I was lucky!
Right after paper. Treated my parent to watch IP MAN 2 (葉问2) - Comment is, Good, worth watching. One of the better recent movie from HK movie market, can't wait to see more good HK movie! They were so good in the past, but affected by piracy..
Next few activities would keep me busy for 2 whole day. Catching Iron Man 2 (omy with WOL pals since we last met) *happy*, Shopping with Mel, Haircut, food tasting too, on wednesday, which is today! Thats fast. (1.58am)
Thursday would be church first, then The Backup Plan with Caroline, then met Eve and Stef for swim, sing song at Eve's changi club house.. hoho hoho so happening. hahah (i must go buy new swim suit, old one is dying soon)
Friday. Work! - Don't know what to expect. But sure a moutainous high backlogs and issues to be settle. Never mind, shan't think about this now since I've finally put down the study cap. Still too soon to put back the working cap. Now, it has to be the happy cap. :P
Sat, even more meaningful, volunteering (company's) to bringi MINDS kids to SG flyer with games.. looking forward to it.. Such a meaningful event.. (for me at least) though those who are going are super "heads" of section... (wonder how they will take it). Cos no matter what, these kids have a much simpler mind than us (or "them") opps... badmouthing but nvm, only my friend, you, are reading. hehehe...(just sharing ok)
I've shared photos I've took of SHE Concert on my facebook... too big to load into this space... and its super slow to load!!! Give up doing it. If you want to have a glance, go see my facebook. (since i'm on leave, i've, ironically, be frequent on Fb and MSN. Think this will last for only the next 2 days!!!hahahha
[cant wait for 22 May, another exciting, happening event!!]
[oh., i'm cantoring this sunday O.O]
[time to refresh my soul and mind during the next few months break]
[time to get back to korean]
[time for exercise]
[time for friends catch up]
[time to explore RW and MBS]
[time to know more ppl, get out of my comfort zone]
Time for my 7 hours of beauty slp!! see you later today WOL pals!!!
*candice - jia you oh!!!! all the best.
목요일, 2월 26, 2009
Fine!
Been undiscipline to get seated and study.. even though I've cut down on outtings and personal social activities.. Sorry for all the rejects from me... Cos this period is really crucial if this doesnt work for me... it meant I'll have a even tougher time next year..
All i need is jia you from u.. and understanding. Thanks.
been catching up w candice as usual... but it seems something ... changing.. but dont know wat.. maybe i too stress and tired.. so always feel restless bah..
1 week never see mical
2 weeks or more never see Eddie, steven
1 month never seen Irene, Melissa, zibi
1-2 month never see Damien, chiho, norman,
about 3 mths nvr see puileng and evan.
worse at least 4mth never see nicole.
and the ulimate - more than 6-8 mths never seen terrence.
miss danielle whose in NZ.
more than 3 mths nvr exercise.
more than 2 mths nvr spend crazily or eat at restaurant.
wanting to start scrapbook but dont like to do it alone. .. erg... but have too cos not many ppl hav interest in this.
just had musical seats at office this monday.. I've change place .. further from my boss who used to be behind me.. now in front of me... (w some distance la) New place is brighter but noisy cos always can hear z.z.z.z.z.z. printing sound from the printing behind....
dots.... but nvm. still acceptable.
realise from stephanie (church friend) that Sister Edwina - is no longer a nun so when u see her please call her edwina.. ya.. i find it diffcult to change suddenly but its a truth.
May God bless her.
每个人都需要有人关心着,照顾着和爱惜着。我也不例外。我有的是家人的爱与关心,朋友的体贴与抱容。照顾吗就要靠自己了!
加油我一定能做到的!
interested places are - Korea in 2010, NZ in 2011 (visit danielle also ask her bring me around), 2012 wow.. UK idea hor... oplympic time.. hahah small short trips to beachy places - philippines Boracay, Bali, Phuket and Hong Kong, Taiwant(visit Angel), ok... stop dreamming le.. study time.. atleast this blog help me to stay awake. thanks for the suggestion to update blog...
note: if sometime u think jean yeo is going the wrong direction please tell me. cos thats wat friends are for. thanks....
Jia yi
목요일, 12월 18, 2008
Sudden Swing!
Up, Down. Fast, Slow. Energetic, Weakly. Ambitious, Subtle. Dangerous, Safe. Constant, inconsistent. Enjoyable, Disgusting. Dared, Feared. Glad, Worry. Future, Past. Front, Back.
Another thing that swing most is a Mood. Is this in control? I have no idea. I only know the result. Either pissed off or feel blissful.
Good example. 7 Dec, completed the Standard Chartered 10 Km marathon. Felt really good and happy. Next hour or so, I'm pissed by my friend. Spoilt the whole day.
Stayed at home recently, glad and happy that I have all the time I want. But irritated by the fact of missing friends yet don't want to meet them. Super duper contradicting. x_X
Having my block leave soon. Looking forward and the trip to Phuket. A night spoilt cos I Missed My Corporate Finance class. Freak!! It lesson on Dividend Policy - one of the most useful and interesting chapter I would like. And very related to work. But missed cos of work and for block leave. See how contradicting life can be. The most terrible fact is that is the last lesson before term break!!!!! Freaking irritated and sad. Same complained to norman again. Sorry for that. Cos i know only you will entertain my such msg.
Mical made it better when she initate to ask out for study on sat. Withdrawn initially. Tried to politely reply that I may not want and change topic. But she kept returning on track on the topic. Yea. At the moment I'm fine to meet with her. Maybe I really need someone to accompany to study as I'm seriously getting no where! I hate this. Its so stupid and I'm seeing this happen. Its even more stupid. Crap.
Frustrated so decided to blog. Yes, it tonight that these happened.
On the LRT. This theory surfaced. Don't know if you agree.
Your family are the parent tree sheltering you at growing stage.
When you grow up, your limbs, knowledge, humane, feelings, teaching and culture are the roots that grow deep and strong into earth holding you real tight and firm in the forest. In this, you can weather against any storm that comes your way.
While, friends, are the same species as you whom you share the same soil and environment when growing up.
But if bad weather you choose to let go, you will lose your roots, and fall. You may fall but friends are near the environment whom will give you the cushion support to prevent you from complete collapsing. Your family, will block the bad weather even before it reaches you. SO You Should Never Let Loose. Hold and Grip Tight to the roots in that soils of that environment where you grown up. You can grow very very tall to see, feel and participate in the world. But you don't need to transplant to other environment to be in the World. Cos in those place. Trees around you are not the same species in the new environment with new soil. Most importantly, you lose your shelter.
Good night. Merry Christms and Happy New Year.
I want a happy and stress free trip. It will be. Keep things simple. Memorable does not mean expensive. Relax and let the time go slowly.
Close to nature thats what I want to experience in this trip. Not shopping.
Jean.
수요일, 10월 08, 2008
Time Value, Relationship Values
Now and again, this feeling is returning. Isnt better than previous as now additional responsibility is put upon me. Student again. This has indirectly place a financial responsibility on me as well.
Needed to talk to someone but who actually understands. Yet I dont want to bring my troubles to others when they do have their own.
Can I declare sabbatical leave from wol?
I do not know why we only meet up only when there is birthday. I'm not asking alot. Actually, I mean, can't we meet as and when we miss each other for dinner, shopping or any other simple daily activities.
On my list when i want call ppl out for dinner or watever, 1st is candice, eddie....
It really doesnt matter if i call them and they cant make it some times. I'm fine.
Seems to me that it has slowly become an obligation to once in a while catch up with friends. Why is this so? Do I hate it? NO. Do I dislike it? Yes. Why? Because it has to come with feelings not a obligational task.
I really need a break to revitalise myself...
Oct weekend is so packed. Hate it. And why am I not concentrating enough in my studies. No one can answer this.
Until, Sunday after the HOPE run. It's been awhile I've attended the 11am mass @ church. Father Yeo's homily gave light to my dullness, that everyday we are bless by God to be awake and alive thru his works. Every day has a purpose and reason for you to live, to live his words and do his works. Be forgiving and passionate to every day's life.
To myself - Jean, dont you ever run away! U didnt in the past when memories were bad because you believed. Now, just believe and all things will be fine according to God's way.
Let me stay onshore away from the waves and tides, please.
Sometimes giving too much- you need to replenish.
*have i ever said something that hurt you significantly or insignificantly? Please tell me, at least i am aware and can take note in the future. as I understand its sad more than hurting to hear that from a friend.
Jean am i.
토요일, 7월 19, 2008
Now waiting for my class to start, suddenly felt tremendously tired and emotional till I want to make use of this 5 mins to pen down my thoughts and feelings. Instead of messaging my friends and 'disturb them just to keep me accompanied.
Lifestyle has been changing for me. Is it a tremendously change or a 36' change? I'm not too sure too. However, I know that my thoughts have change to practicality; words has become more forefront and blunt; behaviour had been even more individualistic.
I've once told a friend that (I need to talk to someone man. As I've been listening and accompanying others. Yet, I want time for my self. I want to relax and talk all I want about anything openly. Basically, want attention but avoiding companion.) How could this happen to me.
Did I close my own doors? or I am in the mids of destroying it.
Sometimes it meant no harm with those words of mine. But it just came out. Maybe I have no other ways of expressing myself better or in the way people seems to perceive of me.
Life just need to be really simple and cry out loud when you need to!
Truly, my words at times of truth from the heart has not change!
class starting, will continue next time.
*PS feeling much better after writing (expressing) this out.
jean.
토요일, 9월 08, 2007
人
人为什么不能满足?
人为什么不能简单点?
我们在您眼中,
不是应该真心真意吗?
人不是应该要彼此爱惜吗?
人不是应该要过得满足吗?
人不是应该要以您为榜样吗?
这些有那么难吗?
为什么人还是做不倒呢?
화요일, 7월 10, 2007
A RollerCoaster Ride
수요일, 6월 20, 2007
Finally I am not Strong
Eventually fall ill with a cough, slight fever, couple of drinks and up it goes the temperature. Maxi it hit 39.0'c wow that really rare for me to get this high fever.
Love pa and ma.
일요일, 6월 10, 2007
GSS, CONCERT & GATHERINGS
2 jun, sat - May Day JUmp concert 2007
Kaiway, jin hui, clement, david and me attended and witnessed the great and fantastic performance by 五月天. Lots of song they sang, old, new and popular ones too. Super as the already are. Thanks to kw auctioned the tickets.. and we went to the middle and stand.. * 2nd part of concert is damn high .. every one were lead to JUMP away from the earth surface. They are good with crowds man.
3 jun, sun - Baby Kayven's bday - 1 yr old
family gathering when cousin esther come back from USA with 2 citizenship baby kayven.. cute as he is..
6 jun, wed - dinner with THE MEN
NS for sgprean guys are complusory so .. we had a little farwell blessing dinner with damien, yong siang, eddie with gals candice, jieying and me at swensen orchard. weird thing is today(10 jun, sunday) damien should already be in the camp BUT he was on MSN- I was surprise.. alright will disclose the mystery at my next entry kk!!
9 jun, sat - choir wedding and GSS 3rd shopping spree
1st time choir for wedding .. feel so blessed for the couple. i see the church, it was not fill up very much... but they are witnessed in marriage in the eyes of god so it does not matter.
However, I would wish that my own will have many ppl coming to share with me the joyous moment. and walking down the aisle and be offered the blessing from friends, family, pals, gals, partners, and many others.
Noon time, out in the GSS by 12pm - wow pretty early and not crowded.. thanks puileng.. we can avoid crowd. ok .. i'll wake up early next time. hahaha for the sake of less crowd and easy shopping!! personal items and presents.
here you go..
got a dark blue jeans for 30+ at heeren.
yellow offshoulder top from cineleisure.
and two pretty un--es from topshop/promotion
anyway pls dont mistake it, its not for me its for friend's bday.. hehehe.
Previously, i had 2 rounds of shopping and bought make-up items
BODY SHOP - cucumber milk* and water* and concealer
*heard gona to cut stock soon.
FACE SHOP - blusher, lip gloss*, and facial mask.
*now lips are better not that dry le.. a tip dont put ur lip balm with lip gloss if u have dry lips.. it'll be worse. :)
so .. many more things to buy.. its a long wish list.. watches i saw it 50% discount at Tang, [Denni
brand] and ladies's 小可爱 under promotion too...
recently many ppl birthday.. fainting le cos pocket's hole is getting bigger, but i'm happy for them !!
ok nitey really sleep, share again next week .
수요일, 5월 23, 2007
老婆 是你吗?
到今天
还有明天
感谢老天让你们陪在我身边
爱的心
痛的心
等待的心
因为有你们的拥抱我很放心
当初见面的不安彼此探索
也许有点茫然迷惑
朝夕相处才放现这世界中
没有人比你们更懂我
朋友 姐妹
都已不够来形荣
我们的默奇骄傲扶持与包容
老婆 老婆
我们一起打勾勾
请记得约定的旅程到永久。
Well this chinese song is a meaning full one for SHE but to me it is so for friends who can be this good too.
This is a real unique relationship which they possess, how much I hope I'll have this exist in my life but not yet or i just didnt know yet.
Friends from the Beginning to the NeverEnding.
I'll invite you to enjoy this meaninful song from the deepest of my warmest heart. :p
월요일, 3월 12, 2007
My Tarot Representation
An interesting review here about myself, after my WOL introduce us to spent our time with it.
My Tarot Card is the 'The Lovers' which represents intuition and inspiration whereby a choice has to be made often. Yet there is motive, power and actioning arising from it.
Originally, this card was called just LOVE. And that's actually more apt than "Lovers." Love follows in this sequence of growth and maturity. And, coming after the Emperor, who is about control, it is a radical change in perspective. LOVE is a force that makes you choose and decide for reasons you often can't understand; it makes you surrender control to a higher power. And that is what this card is all about. Finding something or someone who is so much a part of yourself, so perfectly attuned to you and you to them, that you cannot, dare not resist. This card indicates that the you have or will come across a person, career, challenge or thing that you will fall in love with. You will know instinctively that you must have this, even if it means diverging from your chosen path. No matter the difficulties, without it you will never be complete.
Red: How true can it be? But I'll admit that I follow my heart when I make decisions at any ocassion. There's Pros and Cons however, only this I'll never regret about the choice I've made because that's the true me!! - Sixth Sense as my instinct for everything, strong and accurate as it has been.
You are The Lovers
To find out more about yourself and your Tarot Card, click below. All the best!
What Tarot Card are You?
Take the Test to Find Out.
~Managing your life makes others ' easier ~ your convenice may result to others' inconvenice ~
jean